23 August, 2017 • Posted in Life, Love

    Losing a first love

    Losing a love is tough.

    Losing your first love, however, is the true test.

    Right now you are probably thinking you will never get over this… I won’t lie to you and say it will be easy to do. But I can promise you will see the other side.

    Being on the other side is so refreshing and freeing to be in. And I want you to be too.

    Taking time to grieve

    One thing I kept forcing myself to do was to get over it. I felt I needed to stop thinking about things and hurry to move on. But you know what? You are allowed to take time to be hurt. You are allowed to cry and feel pain. This is all part of you moving on. Don’t ever think because you are sad and hurting that you are pining over this. If you, however, are in a space where you feel you want to get things back on track then that’s great. But I know there are relationships such as mine where it’s taken out of your hands and it’s the best thing that has to happen. In the end as bad as it feels right now, you have to go through the worst for it to be better.

    No contact

    If you truly want to move on and start again. Do not make any contact. None whatsoever. This will delay your healing and prolong your hurt. It will not do you any good. I did this and in the end, it felt like I was constantly going through a breakup and it was draining and most of all tiring. It often left me feeling I was waiting. Waiting for what? That’s the thing there was nothing to wait for. It left me in a spiral I felt I couldn’t get out of. Once I lost all ties, all connection I started to feel free.

    Do the things you love

    It helps to keep yourself busy. Be distracted. The best way to do this is to do the things you love. If you love being creative then immerse yourself into your project or start one. Start watching a tv series, or read a book you love. I love to write so I would get stuck in this blog and work on content that I love to share. Beauty is another love of mine, I would often search online or into stores and check out the latest craze. It was nice to get lost and keep my mind my focus on something else.

    Surround yourself with great people

    During the time I was grieving, being around friends and family helped a lot. I would often stay at my mum’s as she was always a great support and spend time with my brothers. I would also have girlie days with my girlfriends or movie nights in and indulge in junk food which was always my favorite. It was also a great reminder of those who loved and cared about me. Best of all it was great for those moments of when loneliness would strike and allowing you to know you are not alone.

    Keeping active

    Now I know this is not for everyone. But this was an incredible help for my mood. You can get a quick workout in the gym or take long walks which were something I often did. This helped to clear my mind and get some fresh air too.  You can even be involved in activities or a sport where you get to meet new people too. I would sign up to many gym classes and met some fantastic ladies, yoga by far was my favourite.


    These were steps I adopted which helped loads during that time. Remember time is a healer and only you can help yourself to heal and I promise you, you will see the other side.

    Till my next post..

    Yasmin x

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